...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
