god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
where does the pee come out of this thing
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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