Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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