As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
