drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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