She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
