I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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