Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
