I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize