Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
