Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
