She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
