My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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