I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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