So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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