how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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