what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Holy shit dude........stairs
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
