I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
