Swine flu. Run for my life!
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Randomize
