I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize
