New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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