dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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