Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
