But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
