I think I can smell my own vagina right now
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
