careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
