If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Randomize
