imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
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