I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
