mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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