I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
