this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
