I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
