its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
