oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
