sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
