I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
no you cant smoke seaweed
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
