If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
