dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
so let's talk penis.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Watching her eat just hurts me
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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