***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize