I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize