it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
try to milk me bitch
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