Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
We just shotgunned beers for America
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize