Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
