I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Randomize
