You can't motorboat a personality
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
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