So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize
