i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Randomize
