No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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