Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
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