But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
i love accidental penises.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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